It happens in a flash. That freeze that hits his body like a bucket of ice water. Danny seizing up around his fingers, leg muscles clenching suddenly into something far closer to clinging around his hips. Fingers digging into his back with the kind of force to bruise small dots into his back or arm, but not in the right way. Not like this. Not when Danny's pulse is spiking harder, but it comes with a gasp for air, sudden flinching and that sound that stumbles out Danny's mouth.
That nearly makes Steve's chest try to jump outside of himself. Idiocy and concern vying for each other, against something slick, oiled, and stupid clawing its way up the inside of his chest, inside of his ribs, his spine with long needle like claws. Something like desperation smashing in those waves rocking up from the pit in his stomach that has nothing left to stand on.
"Hey," Steve said. Firm, firmer than anything feels in him. Moving a little slower, a pacing consistency, but not stopping. Not about to stop. Not about to let Danny's seize up entirely and undo all he's already done, doing so well with, pushing into himself. Not until or unless Danny asks him to. Needs him to. Which isn't quite yet. He thinks. Hopes. Pushes. Himself, and Danny, fingers still moving.
When he's licking his lips and talking into Danny's mouth. Keeping his voice that way. "Stay with me, Danny."
Here, with him. Where Danny drug him up to. Here, with him, where he keeps telling Danny he is. Where he keeps shoving everything else out for, no matter how loud and dizzyingly distracting it gets, or how much it feels like he's going to combust if something doesn't happen, because he wants Danny, here with him, wants to be here with Danny, more than he wants any of the rest of it. Because he'd still choose to be here, here with Danny, even if he hadn't said anything on the couch downstairs.
Which makes him all the more of fool for pushing and then needing to say it. For needing to find his way into Danny's mouth, pulling on his bottom lip before kissing him, like an even more immediate request, or demand, teasing drag to pull Danny's focus back to him, back to the better things. Because it'll get easier. He knows that. If it doesn't stop, it'll get better. Along with the list of reasons he doesn't do this kind of thing, but would rather have his skin boiled off before he'd leave Danny or stop or want it to be anyone else.
no subject
That nearly makes Steve's chest try to jump outside of himself. Idiocy and concern vying for each other, against something slick, oiled, and stupid clawing its way up the inside of his chest, inside of his ribs, his spine with long needle like claws. Something like desperation smashing in those waves rocking up from the pit in his stomach that has nothing left to stand on.
"Hey," Steve said. Firm, firmer than anything feels in him. Moving a little slower, a pacing consistency, but not stopping. Not about to stop. Not about to let Danny's seize up entirely and undo all he's already done, doing so well with, pushing into himself. Not until or unless Danny asks him to. Needs him to. Which isn't quite yet. He thinks. Hopes. Pushes. Himself, and Danny, fingers still moving.
When he's licking his lips and talking into Danny's mouth. Keeping his voice that way. "Stay with me, Danny."
Here, with him. Where Danny drug him up to. Here, with him, where he keeps telling Danny he is. Where he keeps shoving everything else out for, no matter how loud and dizzyingly distracting it gets, or how much it feels like he's going to combust if something doesn't happen, because he wants Danny, here with him, wants to be here with Danny, more than he wants any of the rest of it. Because he'd still choose to be here, here with Danny, even if he hadn't said anything on the couch downstairs.
Which makes him all the more of fool for pushing and then needing to say it. For needing to find his way into Danny's mouth, pulling on his bottom lip before kissing him, like an even more immediate request, or demand, teasing drag to pull Danny's focus back to him, back to the better things. Because it'll get easier. He knows that. If it doesn't stop, it'll get better. Along with the list of reasons he doesn't do this kind of thing, but would rather have his skin boiled off before he'd leave Danny or stop or want it to be anyone else.